| THE
SPEED OF MARRIAGE
Are
you ready?
Here's an easy booster for your marriage.
(workbook 19)
All
day long you're probably running to do this
and running to do that. Always running.
And
there's no doubt your fast pace has an impact
on
your relationship. If you're anything like
most
couples, there's a certain edge of impatience
between you.
It's
time to slow down and take the
edge out. This week I want you to stop running
and
WALK.
I
mean it literally. Go for a walk with your
spouse.
When
was the last time you walked out of your
house with your spouse JUST TO BE WITH YOUR
SPOUSE? In other words, normally when you
leave
the house with your spouse you're going somewhere.
But as long as you have a destination, there's
some level of angst to your journey.
This
time when you leave the house with your
spouse, I want you to go nowhere. That's
right...NOWHERE. Just walk. No destination.
You're
already exactly where you're supposed to be...with
your spouse.
It's
actually quite interesting to see your
neighborhood at less than 25 MPH. You'll see
things you never saw before. You'll feel a
peace
in your neighborhood you didn't know existed.
When
you go on your walk, share that experience
with
each other.
Now
remember, this is not your exercise for the
day. It's not a speed walk. It's not possible
for
your spouse to be walking too slow. If you're
one
of those people who's always a few paces ahead
of
your spouse, then concentrate on walking TOGETHER.
You
can do this even if you're separated. Ask
your
spouse if they have a few minutes for you
to come
over one night this week. Then take your spouse
for a walk to nowhere. Walking to nowhere
is
romantic.
The
nice thing about going for a walk with your
spouse compared to going out to dinner, for
example, is that you won't feel pressure to
talk.
When you're sitting across a table from someone
having dinner, you feel like you have to make
conversation. But sometimes it feels good
to be
with someone in silence. A stroll is conducive
to
silence. Stroll. Be silent. Just be together.
Go
for a walk.
I
just took a break from writing this and took
a
walk with my wife. It's Sunday afternoon here
in
Baltimore. My kids were in the pool. I was
writing. And my wife was busy reorganizing
a room.
I printed out a draft of what I'm writing,
took it
with me, and said, "Honey, can we go
for a short
walk?"
"Why?"
she asked.
"Just
because," I responded.
She
humored me and we walked. I showed her my
favorite house in the neighborhood. And then
I
asked her to stop and give me her thoughts
on what
I was writing (this assignment). She smiled
as she
reviewed it and said, "I like it."
I hope you do too.
Mort
Fertel
Author & Founder of Marriage Fitness
|
SECURE & CONFIDENTIAL
