Does separation work?
Many people wonder, “Does separation work?”
Debby and her husband tried to see if separation would work for them. Debby’s husband moved out to live with another woman. With the help of the Marriage Fitness Tele-Boot Camp program, her husband moved back into their home for good! Their marriage is better than ever!
If you’ve been asking yourself does separation work, read Debby’s email to us below:
Separation After 30 Years
“I wanted to thank you for your support during my recent separation from my husband of 30 years. I wanted to share my happy ending with you.
We have always had what everyone thought was the “perfect marriage” and so did I. We had our ups and downs, but we were caring, giving, and loving with each other. My husband, however, after turning 50 seemed to think he had missed out on something, and left me for another woman. I was devastated, and did not see it coming as we had always been best friends, had a great sex life, and had worked together in our family medical office. He had become unhappy in life, and our children had recently moved away from our small town, so we moved to a larger city. He had gastric bypass, lost 150 pounds, and for the first time in a long time had more female attention than he was used to. I was stressed with the move, a new job, had taken on 17 UC and FM offices as Medical Director, and we were living in an apartment with our college age children trying to figure out where we wanted to buy a home. He met a woman during this vulnerable time, and despite a wonderful 2 weeks in Maui, when we returned, he moved out to live with her. That is when I found your program.
Saving a Marriage Alone
I started it on my own, and then got him to listen to some of the CD’s. We talked. We e-mailed. We worked together at an UC and no one there ever knew we had separated. We love each other, and he was miserable and sad, and felt very guilty for his actions, but due to that, he did not attend our counseling session with you either. I did not give up. You kept my faith up that things could get better. I loved him through his crisis, and reminded him of our strengths and history. I gave him cards, brought him Starbucks when he was working, made him treats with notes left on his desk at work, and sent him a postcard to the office (didn’t want to send it to her house) when I went to visit my brother in CA saying I wish you were here. He would call me on the phone and we would talk for hours, and he would e-mail me jokes or funny things to read. And so it began.
After 2 1/2 months, he begged my forgiveness, I begged his, and we reaffirmed our love, and he came back home. The children were angry with him, but we loved them through this and talked openly with them about how all relationships have problems, but it is how we handle those problems that make us who we are, and allow us to reap the benefits of our efforts. We told them that the most important thing is that we did not give up on each other, and now we were stronger than before.
Celebrating Our 30th Anniversary!
My husband and I have been back together for 5 months. We renewed our vows with our children officiating at our 30th anniversary 8/9/10, we have purchased our dream home, have coordinated our schedules to have 3 days off per week together when we rock climb, ski, hike, or relax. We have finished our medical thriller, “The Clones of Harvest Home,” and Catherine Coulter and her agent are assisting us with the publishing process. We have taken a 2 1/2 week vacation to Maui, and have been even closer than before we split up. As I said, we have been each other’s best friend since we were 19, and continue to be, but our trials have taught us so much about each other. We are very in love, and know that we will have some ups and downs, but know that we are soul mates, and will be together forever.
Thank you for helping us have the strength to get through this most difficult time. I am not sure I could have done it without you. I would have given up and believed that because he was with someone else that we were done. If I had not reached out to him, his pride would not have let him come back I am sure. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your wonderful philosophy and program. We are forever indebted.
I have recommended your program to several of my patients, and co-workers, and I hope they will take advantage of what you offer, and reap the benefits as well. Happy holidays.
Debby Salter, M.D.
(you may use this testimonial if you would like to – I would be honored)”
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