Evaluate Your Marriage: The Five Minute Marriage Check-Up
In this article, you’ll find a quick way to evaluate your marriage. Using this simple system, you can spot these little areas that need attention before they become an issue.
My name is Joan and I struggled with marriage difficulties for a number of years. It wasn’t until I became proactive and exercised my relationship began to blossom.
A happy and healthy marriage is one of the most difficult and rewarding goals we can make. Yet, we often see marriages that flounder simply because small signs of trouble or vulnerability were overlooked until they’d blossomed into serious trouble.
So, keep reading my post to find the Five Minute Marriage Check Up which can help you not only build a stronger marriage, but have more fun, too.
Did you flirt with your mate this week?
Flirting shouldn’t be something you reserve for date night or your first few months of marriage. This question helps you evaluate your marriage’s romance and vitality. Feeling attractive and desirable is an important part of maintaining a healthy marriage and we need to be able to satisfy that need from our spouse, not from other people in our lives, which can lead to serious trouble. If you haven’t flirted with your mate this recently, they’re due for a wink, a little innuendo or a sexy note.
Does your mate feel respected this week?
All of us need to feel that we are not only loved by our spouses, but respected as well. Your mate will benefit greatly by hearing you praise them to friends, your children or your coworkers and they’ll appreciate hearing it directly, too. Telling your husband that he really earned that new promotion or that you love how well he fixes things can go a long way to helping him feel valued. Neglecting that need could leave him looking for love elsewhere.
Did you laugh with your mate this week?
Laughter is not only good medicine; it’s a vitamin boost for any marriage. The power of a good laugh should never be overlooked in a marriage. This question evaluates your marriage’s friendship and comfort level. Good friends laugh together–so do good marriage partners! Share a joke, watch a funny movie or have a good, old fashioned food fight. It’ll do you a world of good.
Have you spent time alone together this week?
Brushing your teeth at the same time doesn’t count. Our schedules have never been busier and we all live demanding lives that ask us to divide our time between work, family responsibilities and other obligations. A lot of attention is given to making sure we have “me” time, but “we” time is just as important. This question can help you evaluate your marriage for the strength of your relationship as a couple, as opposed to co-parents. You don’t have to try to carve out a date night every week, but you do need to spend a few minutes a day, a few hours a month alone, even if it’s just for a quick coffee date, some iced tea on the patio or a browse through your favorite bookstore.
Do you owe your spouse an apology this week?
Unresolved conflict or an unspoken apology, even over tiny issues, can lead to a hidden but growing resentment. Some things are better left unsaid, but “I’m sorry” isn’t one of them. If you never apologized for getting snippy about the electric bill, forgetting about dinner with the in-laws or laughing at your mate’s latest idea, do so now. Saying “I’m sorry” is an investment that pays an unexpectedly high dividend.
Some of these questions and points may seem small, but marriage is made up of a lot more small things than it is big ones and paying attention to them will lead to a strong, healthy and happy marriage.
If you want more ideas about what you can do to understand more about your marriage, then I urge you to give Mort Fertel’s Marriage Fitness a try.
It’s easy to get started (all you have to do is fill out the box at the top of the page) and you’re on your way. You can do it alone or with your partner. Give your relationship a chance and find out what direction your marriage is headed.