Many women have echoed the cry, “I am tired of my husband trying to change me.”
As a general rule, change is not always the enemy. In fact, change is what helps us to grow and develop into better versions of ourselves.
The same applies in marriage. When both spouses are receptive to self-improvements, their marriage can grow and develop.
Change can also be a relationship-killer, especially when it is forced or tied directly in with a person’s value. Relentless demand for adjustments without positive reinforcement or encouragement can lead a couple straight down the road to divorce.
My name is Jennifer and I am a guest blogger on Mort’s site. I encourage you that instead of saying, “I want to leave my husband,” you need to first take some time to discuss this issue with your spouse. You also need to be open to the possibility that some of his ideas are valid – even if they aren’t expressed correctly.
Discover 7 Secrets to Fixing Your Marriage
How to Be Receptive Without Being Submissive
“I am tired of my husband trying to change me” is not the same as “I am tired of my husband abusing me.”
There is a huge difference between a husband who has a difficult time expressing his desire for and a husband who demands obedience at all costs. There is no excuse for a husband who controls his spouse with physical or verbal abuse. This kind of behavior is a good indicator of when to divorce him.
In most other cases, however, what you have is a case of ineffective communication. Your husband sees something in the relationship that needs improvement, but has no idea how to properly bring about that change.
The best way to handle the “husband trying to change me” scenario in marriage is have an OPEN conversation.
Set aside whatever resentment or frustration you may have, and sit down with your partner. Listen to what he’s trying to say and see if there is anything in your own behavior that could stand some improvement. Then, if his requests are reasonable, agree to take steps to actively transform your own behavior.
If your husband has a tendency to link your self worth with your performance, make it very clear that your love should be unconditional, not based on good works.
By having an open ear and a willingness to accept POSITIVE criticism, you’re setting an example. Your husband may then, in turn, be inclined to hear your side of the story.
You can be receptive without submitting to abuse.
Where to Turn for Help
In most marriages, addressing the “husband trying to change me” complaint can be problematic without help.
Couples dealing with this issue should look for advice from someone skilled in the art of effective marriage counseling.
If you want to learn how to implement constructive change and save your marriage, you need Marriage Fitness.
Marriage Fitness is a groundbreaking alternative to traditional marriage counseling. This revolutionary program focuses on building up your relationship with your spouse by instituting positive habits.
In essence, you learn how to properly recommend change, and how to receive and apply those recommendations.
Marriage Fitness also teaches you how to fix a marriage suffering from:
Put a stop to your “husband trying to change me” protest and get in shape with Marriage Fitness.
I encourage you to try my free marriage e-course first. All you have to do is enter your email address in the box at the top of this blog post. I will send you “7 Secrets to Fixing Your Marriage” – and 5 marriage assessments – absolutely FREE.