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Heal from old wounds in your
marriage
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Get yourself a glass of water. Really! Don't
just read on; first get a glass of water.
Got it?
Okay. Now, hold the glass of water in your hand
and pick it up.
Are you holding it up?
Now let me ask you this: How heavy is the glass
of water?
What do you guess it weighs? 1 pound? 2 pounds?
Less than a pound?
Keep holding the glass up. Don't put it down yet.
What do you think it weighs?
As you continue to hold the glass of water,
you'll notice that its real weight doesn't matter
as much as how long you hold it. The longer you
hold the glass of water, the heavier it feels,
right?
If you hold the glass of water for minute, it's
not a problem. It's not heavy.
But if you hold the glass of water for an hour,
your arm might start to ache. Eventually the
glass of water will feel like a ton of bricks.
The weight of the glass of water is always the
same. But the longer you hold it up, the heavier
it gets.
That's the way it works in your
marriage too. Things are bound to happen between
you and your spouse that will weigh heavy on you
and your spouse's heart. But the longer you "hold
them in," the heavier the burdens gets.
I can't tell you how many times I'll discover in
private sessions that the source of someone's
anger or bitterness is something that happened 15
YEARS AGO!
"Did you ever discuss what happened with your
spouse," I'll ask.
"No."
In an effort to make sure I understand I'll ask,
"You never talked it through? You never processed
with your spouse at all?"
"No."
Rhetorically I'll ask, "This has been building up
inside you for 15 YEARS and you never said
anything?!"
"That's right," is the response.
Do you hear that? It happened 15
YEARS AGO! And it still plagues them TODAY. In
fact, as I illustrated above, the burden gets
worse not better.
But do you know what always amazes me? The burden
gets worse for the person who's holding it in.
But their spouse forgot about the incident 15
years ago. They're clueless that the pain even
exists. They would be SHOCKED to learn that their
spouse still remembers what happened no less that
it pains them and remains in their heart.
Do you know what's bothering your
spouse? Do you know the root of their
frustration? Do you know what they just can't let
go of? And most importantly, do you know how to
draw it out and how to help them finally heal?
This is one of the many topics I'll cover in the
upcoming Marriage Fitness Tele-Boot Camp.
Most people have something that continues to
bother them, something that happened years ago
that they never let go of, something that they
never "moved through" with their spouse. And
there it sits; getting heavier and heavier as the
years go by. Until finally it comes out as, "I'm
not happy" or "I want a divorce" or "I don't love
you anymore."
Old wounds that don't get treated aren't really
old; they remain fresh. They're still open sores
that eat away at your marriage from the inside
without you even knowing it. How do you stop the
bleeding? How do you finally let bygones by
bygones and move on in your relationship in a
healthy productive way?
That's one of the things I'll work with you on in
the Marriage Fitness Tele-Boot Camp. You don't have to go anywhere it's
a TELE experience and all you need is a
telephone. For details or to register, go to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/tele-boot-camp.asp
If your spouse won't join you, then sign-up for
the Lone Ranger Track, which is designed to help
people in marriages with obstinate spouses.
You'll learn to single-handedly improve your
situation, and, most importantly, motivate your
spouse to join you in the process of renewing
your marriage.
If you and your spouse want to do the program
together, then register for the Duo Track.
For more info about these tracks or to register,
go to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/tele-boot-camp.asp
The Marriage Fitness Tele-Boot
Camp is a 7-week multi-sensory comprehensive
marriage-transforming experience. The fee is the
same whether you register with your spouse (Duo
Track) or without (Lone Ranger Track). To
register or for more info, go to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/tele-boot-camp.asp
If you can't wait until the next boot camp
begins, then you want MARRIAGE FITNESS HOME-FLEX.
A 9-Phase interactive multi-sensory
relationship-changing self-guided system that
gives you everything you need to transform your
marriage. And you get it all TOMORROW! For more
information or to order, go to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/home-flex.asp
If you'd like to "meet" with me in a 1-on-1
session, you can schedule a PHONE session or a
full-day "house call." For more info and fees, go
to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/marriage-coaching.asp
At the very least, if you're
serious about renewing your marriage, you've got
to listen to the Audio Learning Program of
Marriage Fitness. This is what thousands of
people and couples worldwide are using as an
"audio handbook" to restore their marriage. To
order, go to:
http://www.MortFertel.com/audio-program.asp
Let me know if you have any
questions. I'll do whatever I can to help you. And if I can't, I'll refer you to another marriage counselor. I wish you the best.
Warm
regards,
Mort Fertel, Author & Founder of
Marriage Fitness
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